Job title: Retired Professor Ameritis. Actually I was an Assistant Professor of Management, but who cares. It just means I did more of the same things for less money and I was more humble about it.

Key responsibilities: No one ever told me my responsibilities were "Key."

What I really did at work: If you really want to know, hold any key down. If you are using Netscape, then you'll never know, because it is a piece of crap software package that doesn't recognize standard HTML behaviors.

What Others Do Where I Work: Click here to watch them.

Grading Papers

Department or workgroup: I was once Chairman of the Management and Marketing Department, but then a paranoid dean eliminated departments and the positions of chairperson.We didn't have departments for ten years and then another new dean reinstated them. But by then I'd learned my lesson and wouldn't have been a chairperson again for twice the salary. I learned not to confuse my career with my life.

I use to maintain a web site for alumni of the School of Business. I updated it on a regular basis since my real friends are my students and the alumni, but with the lack of support I received, I'm not sure why I bothered. A former School of Business Dean stopped allowing it to be linked to the School web site because he was a micro-manager and didn't trust anything he couldn't control. Then I committed the sin of having a photo of a student drinking something that "might" have been beer at a college homecoming tailgaiting party. The college couldn't have anyone in the general public thinking that students might drink beer at such an event, so after 10 years of work, my alumni web site was eliminated.

For a while I was also maintaining an advisement website for current students, but the administration not only did not support it, but actually totally ignored it and the fact that it existed, so I gave up. So much for trying to help the students. But as Dr. Phil Chamberlin, a professor of higher education at Indiana, once told us in grad school, "Universities don't exist for the students. They exist for the faculty and administration." So there you have the sad truth.