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Michael Caine

Cain: Just the Facts

  • Born: Rotherhithe, London, England
  • Date: 03/14/1933
  • Star Sign: Pisces
  • Height: 6.2
  • Film Debut: 1950
  • Vehicle: Mini
  • Weapon: Shotgun

Pull my finger! You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off! You wouldn't hit a man with no trousers on, would you? You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off! I want to shoot the pigeons... off my roof. I took a Viagra, got stuck in me throat, I've had a stiff neck for hours. At this point, I'd set you up with a chimpanzee if it'd brought you back to the world! At this point, I'd set you up with a chimpanzee if it'd brought you back to the world! You know, your bobby dangler, giggle stick, your general-two-colonels, master of ceremonies... Yeah, don't be shy, let's have a look. You wouldn't hit a man with no trousers on, would you? I took a Viagra, got stuck in me throat, I've had a stiff neck for hours. You are as precious to me as you were to your own mother and father. I swore to them that I would protect you, and I haven't.

When I get back, remind to tell you about the time I took 100 nuns to Nairobi! You are as precious to me as you were to your own mother and father. I swore to them that I would protect you, and I haven't. Jasper: Your baby is the miracle the whole world has been waiting for. My lord! You're a tripod. When I get back, remind to tell you about the time I took 100 nuns to Nairobi! Yes, I used a machine gun. You are as precious to me as you were to your own mother and father. I swore to them that I would protect you, and I haven't. Jasper: Your baby is the miracle the whole world has been waiting for. It's not the size mate, it's how you use it. You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off! It's not the size mate, it's how you use it. Yes, I used a machine gun.

Your were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off. Your were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off. My lord! You're a tripod. It's not the size mate, it's how you use it. Jasper: Your baby is the miracle the whole world has been waiting for. When I get back, remind to tell you about the time I took 100 nuns to Nairobi! Pull my finger! You wouldn't hit a man with no trousers on, would you? Your were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off. You know, your bobby dangler, giggle stick, your general-two-colonels, master of ceremonies... Yeah, don't be shy, let's have a look. I want to shoot the pigeons... off my roof. At this point, I'd set you up with a chimpanzee if it'd brought you back to the world!

My lord! You're a tripod. You know, your bobby dangler, giggle stick, your general-two-colonels, master of ceremonies... Yeah, don't be shy, let's have a look. I took a Viagra, got stuck in me throat, I've had a stiff neck for hours. Yes, I used a machine gun. Pull my finger! I want to shoot the pigeons... off my roof.

Jim Carrey

Hey, maybe I will give you a call sometime. Your number still 911? Kinda hot in these rhinos. Good Morning, oh in case I don't see you, good afternoon, good evening and goodnight. Alrighty Then Kinda hot in these rhinos. Brain freeze. Alrighty Then Look ma i'm road kill We got no food we got no money and our pets heads are falling off! Haaaaaaarry. We got no food we got no money and our pets heads are falling off! Haaaaaaarry. Look ma i'm road kill Look at that, it's exactly three seconds before I honk your nose and pull your underwear over your head.

Carrey: Just the Facts

  • Born: Newmarket, Ontario, Canada
  • Date: 01/17/1962
  • Star Sign: Capricorn
  • Height: 6.1
  • Film Debut: 1983
  • Vehicle: Chevrolet
  • Weapon: The Mask

It's because i'm green isn't it! It's because i'm green isn't it! Excuse me, I'd like to ASS you a few questions. Look at that, it's exactly three seconds before I honk your nose and pull your underwear over your head. We're going for a ride on the information super highway. Here she comes to wreck the day. I just heard about evans new position,good luck to you evan backstabber, bastard, i mean baxter. Good Morning, oh in case I don't see you, good afternoon, good evening and goodnight. Brain freeze. Your entrance was good, his was better. Here she comes to wreck the day. Look at that, it's exactly three seconds before I honk your nose and pull your underwear over your head.

We're going for a ride on the information super highway. I just heard about evans new position,good luck to you evan backstabber, bastard, i mean baxter. Brain freeze. It's because i'm green isn't it! Here she comes to wreck the day. Your entrance was good, his was better. Hey, maybe I will give you a call sometime. Your number still 911? I just heard about evans new position,good luck to you evan backstabber, bastard, i mean baxter. Look ma i'm road kill Your entrance was good, his was better. Excuse me, I'd like to ASS you a few questions. Good Morning, oh in case I don't see you, good afternoon, good evening and goodnight.

Hey, maybe I will give you a call sometime. Your number still 911? Excuse me, I'd like to ASS you a few questions. Alrighty Then Kinda hot in these rhinos. We're going for a ride on the information super highway. We got no food we got no money and our pets heads are falling off! Haaaaaaarry.

Clint Eastwood

You want a guarantee, buy a toaster. This is my gun, Clyde! Here. Put that in your report!" AND "I may have found a way out of here. Ever notice how sometimes you come across somebody you shouldn't have F**ked with? Well, I'm that guy. This is my gun, Clyde! Are you feeling lucky punk Here. Put that in your report!" AND "I may have found a way out of here. don't p!ss down my back and tell me it's raining. Well, do you have anything to say for yourself? don't p!ss down my back and tell me it's raining. Dyin' ain't much of a livin', boy. Well, do you have anything to say for yourself?

Here. Put that in your report!" AND "I may have found a way out of here. Well, do you have anything to say for yourself? What you have to ask yourself is, do I feel lucky. Well do ya' punk? Well, do you have anything to say for yourself? When a naked man's chasing a woman through an alley with a butcher knife and a hard-on, I figure he's not out collecting for the Red Cross. Here. Put that in your report!" AND "I may have found a way out of here. You see, in this world there's two kinds of people, my friend: Those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig. What you have to ask yourself is, do I feel lucky. Well do ya' punk? Man's gotta know his limitations. This is my gun, Clyde! Dyin' ain't much of a livin', boy. Man's gotta know his limitations.

Eastwood: Just the Facts

  • Born: San Fransisco, CA
  • Date: 05/31/1930
  • Star Sign: Gemini
  • Height: 6.2
  • Film Debut: 1955
  • Vehicle: Gran Torino
  • Weapon: .44 Magnum

When a naked man's chasing a woman through an alley with a butcher knife and a hard-on, I figure he's not out collecting for the Red Cross. don't p!ss down my back and tell me it's raining. When a naked man's chasing a woman through an alley with a butcher knife and a hard-on, I figure he's not out collecting for the Red Cross. Are you feeling lucky punk don't p!ss down my back and tell me it's raining. This is my gun, Clyde! Dyin' ain't much of a livin', boy. What you have to ask yourself is, do I feel lucky. Well do ya' punk? Ever notice how sometimes you come across somebody you shouldn't have F**ked with? Well, I'm that guy. Are you feeling lucky punk This is my gun, Clyde! Ever notice how sometimes you come across somebody you shouldn't have F**ked with? Well, I'm that guy.

This is the AK-47 assault rifle, the preferred weapon of your enemy; and it makes a distinctive sound when fired at you, so remember it. This is my gun, Clyde! Man's gotta know his limitations. You see, in this world there's two kinds of people, my friend: Those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig. What you have to ask yourself is, do I feel lucky. Well do ya' punk? This is the AK-47 assault rifle, the preferred weapon of your enemy; and it makes a distinctive sound when fired at you, so remember it. Man's gotta know his limitations. Well, do you have anything to say for yourself? When a naked man's chasing a woman through an alley with a butcher knife and a hard-on, I figure he's not out collecting for the Red Cross. Are you feeling lucky punk Are you feeling lucky punk What you have to ask yourself is, do I feel lucky. Well do ya' punk?

Morgan Freeman

Well, what is it today? More spelunking? I now issue a new commandment: Thou shalt do the dance. Let me tell you something my friend. Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane. The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks. I don't think they tried to market it to the billionaire, spelunking, BASE-jumping crowd. No, this is Mount Everest. You should flip on the Discovery Channel from time to time. But I guess you can't now, being dead and all. Cities fall but they are rebuilt. Heroes die but they are remembered. I now issue a new commandment: Thou shalt do the dance. I once heard a wise man say there are no perfect men. Only perfect intentions. Mister Wayne, if you don't want to tell me exactly what you're doing, when I'm asked, I don't have to lie. But don't think of me as an idiot. Let me tell you something my friend. Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane. Mister Wayne, if you don't want to tell me exactly what you're doing, when I'm asked, I don't have to lie. But don't think of me as an idiot.

I did the same thing to Gandhi, he didn't eat for three weeks. The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks. Bruce... I'm God. Cities fall but they are rebuilt. Heroes die but they are remembered. The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks. You measure yourself by the people who measure themselves by you. I did the same thing to Gandhi, he didn't eat for three weeks. Rehabilitated? Well, now let me see. You know, I don't have any idea what that means. Rehabilitated? Well, now let me see. You know, I don't have any idea what that means. That tall drink of water with the silver spoon up his ass. Boxing is about respect. Getting it for yourself, and taking it away from the other guy. That tall drink of water with the silver spoon up his ass.

Multiply your anger by about a hundred, Kate, that's how much he thinks he loves you. Rehabilitated? Well, now let me see. You know, I don't have any idea what that means. Let me tell you something my friend. Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane. Circumstances have taught me that a man's ethics are the only possessions he will take beyond the grave. That tall drink of water with the silver spoon up his ass. Cities fall but they are rebuilt. Heroes die but they are remembered. Boxing is about respect. Getting it for yourself, and taking it away from the other guy. Cities fall but they are rebuilt. Heroes die but they are remembered. It only took me six days. Same time it took the Lord to make the world. Boxing is about respect. Getting it for yourself, and taking it away from the other guy. I don't think they tried to market it to the billionaire, spelunking, BASE-jumping crowd. Circumstances have taught me that a man's ethics are the only possessions he will take beyond the grave.

Freeman: Just the Facts

  • Born: Memphis, TN
  • Date: 06/01/1937
  • Star Sign: Gemini
  • Height: 6.2
  • Film Debut: 1971
  • Vehicle: Hudson
  • Weapon: M1911

I don't think they tried to market it to the billionaire, spelunking, BASE-jumping crowd. You measure yourself by the people who measure themselves by you. Bruce... I'm God. It only took me six days. Same time it took the Lord to make the world. Multiply your anger by about a hundred, Kate, that's how much he thinks he loves you. I did the same thing to Gandhi, he didn't eat for three weeks. Well, what is it today? More spelunking? Circumstances have taught me that a man's ethics are the only possessions he will take beyond the grave. I once heard a wise man say there are no perfect men. Only perfect intentions. I once heard a wise man say there are no perfect men. Only perfect intentions. Cities fall but they are rebuilt. Heroes die but they are remembered. I now issue a new commandment: Thou shalt do the dance.

Johnny Depp

We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a saltshaker half-full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... We're not sheep! We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a saltshaker half-full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... A drug person can learn to cope with things like seeing their dead grandmother crawling up their leg with a knife in her teeth. But no one should be asked to handle this trip. Well, then, I confess, it is my intention to commandeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in Tortuga, raid, pillage, plunder and otherwise pilfer my weasely black guts out. We're not sheep! Do you like my meadow? Try some of my grass! Please have a blade, please do, it's so delectable and so darn good looking! We're not sheep! Well, then, I confess, it is my intention to commandeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in Tortuga, raid, pillage, plunder and otherwise pilfer my weasely black guts out. What? No. We can't stop here. This is bat country. We are very much alike, you and I, I and you... us. Do you like my meadow? Try some of my grass! Please have a blade, please do, it's so delectable and so darn good looking!

Do you like my meadow? Try some of my grass! Please have a blade, please do, it's so delectable and so darn good looking! Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid. Do you like my meadow? Try some of my grass! Please have a blade, please do, it's so delectable and so darn good looking! Well, then, I confess, it is my intention to commandeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in Tortuga, raid, pillage, plunder and otherwise pilfer my weasely black guts out. Giddy-up... no, no this way... good horsey. A drug person can learn to cope with things like seeing their dead grandmother crawling up their leg with a knife in her teeth. But no one should be asked to handle this trip. Holy Jesus. What are these goddamn animals? We're not sheep! Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid. Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid. Giddy-up... no, no this way... good horsey. Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid.

We are very much alike, you and I, I and you... us. A drug person can learn to cope with things like seeing their dead grandmother crawling up their leg with a knife in her teeth. But no one should be asked to handle this trip. A drug person can learn to cope with things like seeing their dead grandmother crawling up their leg with a knife in her teeth. But no one should be asked to handle this trip. Holy Jesus. What are these goddamn animals? Forget about it" is, like, if you agree with someone, you know, like "Raquel Welch is one great piece of ass. Forget about it!" But then, if you disagree, like "A Lincoln is better than a Cadillac? Forget about it!" You know? But then, it's also like if something's the greatest thing in the world, like, "Minghia! Those peppers! Forget about it!" What? No. We can't stop here. This is bat country. We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a saltshaker half-full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... Giddy-up... no, no this way... good horsey. We are very much alike, you and I, I and you... us. Giddy-up... no, no this way... good horsey. What? No. We can't stop here. This is bat country. Holy Jesus. What are these goddamn animals?

Forget about it" is, like, if you agree with someone, you know, like "Raquel Welch is one great piece of ass. Forget about it!" But then, if you disagree, like "A Lincoln is better than a Cadillac? Forget about it!" You know? But then, it's also like if something's the greatest thing in the world, like, "Minghia! Those peppers! Forget about it!" We are very much alike, you and I, I and you... us. Holy Jesus. What are these goddamn animals? Well, then, I confess, it is my intention to commandeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in Tortuga, raid, pillage, plunder and otherwise pilfer my weasely black guts out. What? No. We can't stop here. This is bat country. We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a saltshaker half-full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... Forget about it" is, like, if you agree with someone, you know, like "Raquel Welch is one great piece of ass. Forget about it!" But then, if you disagree, like "A Lincoln is better than a Cadillac? Forget about it!" You know? But then, it's also like if something's the greatest thing in the world, like, "Minghia! Those peppers! Forget about it!" Forget about it" is, like, if you agree with someone, you know, like "Raquel Welch is one great piece of ass. Forget about it!" But then, if you disagree, like "A Lincoln is better than a Cadillac? Forget about it!" You know? But then, it's also like if something's the greatest thing in the world, like, "Minghia! Those peppers! Forget about it!"

Depp: Just the Facts

  • Born: Owensboro, KY
  • Date: 06/09/1963
  • Star Sign: Gemini
  • Height: 5.10
  • Film Debut: 1984
  • Vehicle: Impala
  • Weapon: FlintlockPistol

Christopher Walken

I don't know what you want, but I know I can get it for you, with a minimum of fuss! Money, jewels, a *very* big ball of string. Did you hear about the happy Roman? He was "glad he ate her." Did you hear about the happy Roman? He was "glad he ate her." You got the wrong guy, ace! I thought about you every time I jerked off, dickhead. I got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. You know why the Yankees always win, Frank? it's 'cause the other teams can't stop staring at those damn pinstripes. Two little mice fell in a bucket of cream. The first mouse quickly gave up and drowned. The second mouse, wouldn't quit. He struggled so hard that eventually he churned that cream into butter and crawled out. Gentlemen, as of this moment, I am that second mouse. He hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then, when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. You're talking to me all wrong... It's the wrong tone. You do it again and I'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron. Hey, tell me, does your mother sew? BOOM. Get her to sew that! I thought about you every time I jerked off, dickhead. He hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then, when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch.

Walken: Just the Facts

  1. Born: Queens, New York City, NY
  2. Date: 03/31/1943
  3. Star Sign: Aries
  4. Height: 6.0
  5. Film Debut: 1956
  6. Vehicle: Horse
  7. Weapon: Sword

What do you want me to say, that I'm sorry? That I apologize? Well, people in Hell want ice water, pal. You're talking to me all wrong... It's the wrong tone. You do it again and I'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron. Hey, tell me, does your mother sew? BOOM. Get her to sew that! Selina! Selina Kyle, you're fired! And Bruce Wayne, why are you dressed up like Batman? I'm neglecting my other guests. Enjoy yourself, you'll find the young ladies stimulating company. Did you hear about the happy Roman? He was "glad he ate her." This is America, babe, you gotta think big to be big. I don't know what you want, but I know I can get it for you, with a minimum of fuss! Money, jewels, a *very* big ball of string. Two little mice fell in a bucket of cream. The first mouse quickly gave up and drowned. The second mouse, wouldn't quit. He struggled so hard that eventually he churned that cream into butter and crawled out. Gentlemen, as of this moment, I am that second mouse. This is America, babe, you gotta think big to be big. I'm neglecting my other guests. Enjoy yourself, you'll find the young ladies stimulating company. I'm neglecting my other guests. Enjoy yourself, you'll find the young ladies stimulating company. He hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then, when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch.

He hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then, when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. This is America, babe, you gotta think big to be big. Did you hear about the happy Roman? He was "glad he ate her." Selina! Selina Kyle, you're fired! And Bruce Wayne, why are you dressed up like Batman? Two little mice fell in a bucket of cream. The first mouse quickly gave up and drowned. The second mouse, wouldn't quit. He struggled so hard that eventually he churned that cream into butter and crawled out. Gentlemen, as of this moment, I am that second mouse. I don't know what you want, but I know I can get it for you, with a minimum of fuss! Money, jewels, a *very* big ball of string. I got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. I thought about you every time I jerked off, dickhead. What do you want me to say, that I'm sorry? That I apologize? Well, people in Hell want ice water, pal. You got the wrong guy, ace! You're talking to me all wrong... It's the wrong tone. You do it again and I'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron. Hey, tell me, does your mother sew? BOOM. Get her to sew that! Two little mice fell in a bucket of cream. The first mouse quickly gave up and drowned. The second mouse, wouldn't quit. He struggled so hard that eventually he churned that cream into butter and crawled out. Gentlemen, as of this moment, I am that second mouse.

What do you want me to say, that I'm sorry? That I apologize? Well, people in Hell want ice water, pal. You know why the Yankees always win, Frank? it's 'cause the other teams can't stop staring at those damn pinstripes. I don't know what you want, but I know I can get it for you, with a minimum of fuss! Money, jewels, a *very* big ball of string. I'm neglecting my other guests. Enjoy yourself, you'll find the young ladies stimulating company. What do you want me to say, that I'm sorry? That I apologize? Well, people in Hell want ice water, pal. You know why the Yankees always win, Frank? it's 'cause the other teams can't stop staring at those damn pinstripes. You got the wrong guy, ace! You're talking to me all wrong... It's the wrong tone. You do it again and I'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron. Hey, tell me, does your mother sew? BOOM. Get her to sew that! Selina! Selina Kyle, you're fired! And Bruce Wayne, why are you dressed up like Batman? This is America, babe, you gotta think big to be big. I thought about you every time I jerked off, dickhead. You know why the Yankees always win, Frank? it's 'cause the other teams can't stop staring at those damn pinstripes.

Bonus: Jackson

Well, the way they make shows is, they make one show. That show's called a pilot. Then they show that show to the people who make shows, and on the strength of that one show they decide if they're going to make more shows. Some pilots get picked and become television programs. Some don't, become nothing. She starred in one of the ones that became nothing.

Your bones don't break, mine do. That's clear. Your cells react to bacteria and viruses differently than mine. You don't get sick, I do. That's also clear. But for some reason, you and I react the exact same way to water. We swallow it too fast, we choke. We get some in our lungs, we drown. However unreal it may seem, we are connected, you and I. We're on the same curve, just on opposite ends.

Do you see any Teletubbies in here? Do you see a slender plastic tag clipped to my shirt with my name printed on it? Do you see a little Asian child with a blank expression on his face sitting outside on a mechanical helicopter that shakes when you put quarters in it? No? Well, that's what you see at a toy store. And you must think you're in a toy store, because you're here shopping for an infant named Jeb.